The lot. JOANNE is reexamining the cable connections for the
umpteenth time.) MARK
And so into the abyss.The lot. Where a small stage is partially set up. JOANNE
(playing with some wires)
I went to Harvard for this? MARK
Close on Mark's nose dive. JOANNE
"Line out". MARK
Will he get out of here alive.? (JOANNE notices MARK approaching.) JOANNE
I told her not to call you MARK
But can I help since I'm here JOANNE I hired an engineer .
Well, nice to have met you
She's three hours late
The samples won't delay
But the cable
There's another way
JOANNE (into the mike) Test MARK
Anything but that JOANNE
This is weird MARK
It's weird JOANNE
Very weird MARK
Fuckin' weird JOANNE
That I don't know what to do
I'm so mad
Fighting with microphones
Freezing down to my bones
And to top it all off
I'm with you MARK
Feel like going insane?
Got a fire in your brain?
And you're thinking of drinking gasoline? JOANNE
As a matter of fact MARK Honey, I know this act
It's called the 'Tango Maureen'
The Tango Maureen
It's a dark, dizzy merryAs she keeps you dangling JOANNE
You're wrong MARK
Your heart she is mangling JOANNE It's different with me
'Cause her cold eyes can burn
And you toss and you turn
Yet you yearn and you churn and rebound JOANNE
I think I know what you mean BOTH
The Tango Maureen MARK
Has she ever pouted her lips
And called you 'Pookie' JOANNE
Have you ever doubted a kiss or two? JOANNE
This is spooky
Did you swoon when she walked through the door? MARK
Did she moon over other boys
More than moon
I'm getting nauseous
(They begin to dance, with MARK leading.) Where'd you learn to tango?
JOANNE With the French Ambassador's daughter in her dorm room at Miss
Porter's. And you?
MARK Jewish Community Center.
With Nanette Himmelfarb. The Rabbi's daughter at the Scarsdale (They switch, and JOANNE leads.) It's hard to do this backwards. JOANNE
You should try it in heels! She cheated
She cheated JOANNE
Maureen cheated MARK
Fuckin' cheated JOANNE
I should give up right now MARK
With all of your might
Gotta look on the bright side JOANNE
I'd fall for her still anyhow BOTH
When you're dancing her dance
You don't stand a chance
Her grip of romance
Make you fall So you think, 'Might as well'
"Dance a tango to hell" BOTH
'At least I'll have tangoed at all'
Gotta dance till your diva is through
The Tango Maureen
You pretend to believe her
Cause in the end But the end it will come
Till you're glum and you bum
Still you have to play dumb
And turn blue MARK
Why do we love when she's mean? JOANNE
And she can be so obscene MARK
Try the mike
JOANNE My Maureen (reverb: een, een, een.) MARK
I feel lousy
(The pay phone rings. MARK hands it to JOANNE.)
Honey, we're. (pause) Pookie?!
You never call me Pookie.
Forget it, we're patched. (She hangs up, looks at MARK.)
BOTH The Tango Maureen.